To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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