I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
He felt like a one man threesome
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
