There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Randomize
