Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
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