now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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