At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Just pee around me
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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