Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
