You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
