You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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