Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
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