I wish I could punch you in the face.
In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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