i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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