Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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