A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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