i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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