We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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