ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Randomize
