I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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