Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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