Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
