the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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