Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
