it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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