Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
There was a lot of him and a little penis
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
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