Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
