he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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