If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
