i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize