if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
You are a genius and a whore.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
