garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
