haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
You did what with his pubic hair?
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