Betty ford says i'm here all night
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
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