I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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