pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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