OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
