I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Randomize