@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize