I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Randomize
