so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Randomize
