Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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