Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
