I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Randomize