You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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