so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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