Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
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