I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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