She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
