My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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