so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
