So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Randomize
