i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize