Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
